10 things to do when people betray you.
Introduction
It's easy to be bitter after someone has hurt you. But you don't have to sit on that resentment and let it affect your life for years. Here are some ideas for coping with betrayal, as well as tips for moving forward in a healthy way:
The 4 don'ts.
Don't let people make you bitter.
Don't let people make you lose faith in people.
Don't let people make you lose faith in yourself.
Don't let people make you lose faith in the world, or even if they do, don't wallow there for too long; get your butt back out there and find something new to believe in!
It's ok to feel angry about betrayal, but
It's ok to feel angry about betrayal.
Anger is a normal feeling that connects you with your feelings. It can help motivate you to do something about the situation or change yourself so that you're less vulnerable to being betrayed again in the future.
When anger is directed at the wrong person or situation, however, it can turn out badly for everyone involved—especially when it turns into aggression toward others or yourself (e.g., punching walls). In these cases, anger management is essential for keeping your life under control so that there are no negative consequences from expressing this emotion.[1]
Try to take a step back.
It is easy to get caught up in the moment and forget about the big picture. When you are dealing with a betrayal, it is important not to lose sight of what you stand for. By taking a step back, you can gain some much-needed perspective on the situation.
It's also important to keep in mind that there might be more going on than meets the eye; asking questions and seeking out answers will help you better understand why someone may have acted in this way. Try thinking about their motivation or intentions behind their actions; often times these can help explain their behavior more clearly than simply pointing fingers at them would allow
Write down your thoughts and feelings.
When you're going through a traumatic event, it can feel like your mind is constantly running at full speed. You may have a hard time slowing down to think rationally about what's happening and how you feel. Writing down your thoughts and feelings can help you get them out of your head so they're not constantly running in circles. It can also help you see that many people have been through similar experiences and have come out on the other side stronger than before. Remembering that there are others who've dealt with betrayal or rejection can be very reassuring in times of distress.
Bring in outside perspective.
When you're dealing with betrayal, it's important to surround yourself with people who are on your side. Bring in outside perspective by getting help from a therapist or counselor, asking for advice from a friend or family member, reading books about the topic, and talking to someone who has been through similar situations.
Forgive, but don't forget.
Forgiveness is not forgetting.
Forgiveness can be a good way to move forward with your life, but it doesn't require you to have a relationship with the person who betrayed you. In other words, forgiveness is not the same thing as reconciliation. You can forgive someone and still feel angry at them in private moments. Forgiveness is an act of self-care that allows us to let go of our anger and focus instead on moving forward in our lives without wasting energy on old pain or grudges.
Remember that the past is over, and the present matters most.
Focus on the present.
Focus on the future?
Focus on what you can control, instead of what people have done in the past or are doing now.
Make a list of all the things that make you feel good about yourself, then go do them! You have control over your happiness, and no one else does. Remember that sometimes when people betray us it's because they don't know how to help themselves—that doesn't mean they aren't worth our time or friendship!
Remember it's about you, not them.
When someone betrays you, it's natural to feel angry and hurt. But if you really want to move past the betrayal, stop focusing on them and start focusing on yourself.
Don't get caught up in thinking about how the other person feels. It doesn't matter if your friend betrayed you because she thought she was doing what was best for both of you, or if your partner betrayed you because he felt trapped by his job or family obligations. What matters is that they did something that hurt YOU—and it's far more important to spend time figuring out how YOU feel than trying to figure out why they did what they did.
Don't try to understand why someone would betray your trust or break their word—you simply can't know everything about another person's inner life (or even their outer one). And even if there are explanations for their behavior that make sense from a logical perspective, those explanations won’t change the way betrayal makes us feel: angry, upset and wounded by this violation of our trust in them
Distance yourself from the person who hurt you -- at least for a while.
One of the hardest parts of being betrayed is the desire to speak with the person who hurt you. You may want to confront them, explain why their actions were hurtful, or just get closure so that you can move on. But this is not a good idea while you are still feeling vulnerable and hurt. Even when someone apologizes profusely for their behavior, it's tempting to accept their apology because we want everything to go back to normal between us again. However, if we do this too soon after being betrayed by someone close to us (especially if there has been no apology), it may mean that we're giving up our power over how we feel about what happened and giving control back over our emotions back over them again -- which isn't healthy for either party involved in such situations! So instead of talking things through with them directly yet (or even after some time has passed) try talking about your feelings with another trusted friend or relative who will give advice without taking sides; alternatively seek professional help if necessary so that these conversations don't become overwhelming - especially at first while still processing all emotions involved."
Be open with your feelings if you're comfortable to do so.
In an ideal world, you'd be able to tell the person who betrayed you exactly how you feel, and they would apologize sincerely. Unfortunately, this is rarely the case.
Instead of bottling up your feelings, express them as soon as possible—even if it's only to yourself or a trusted friend. Talking about what happened can help you heal faster because venting anger and frustration is healthy for the body and mind.
Don't be afraid to ask for help from others in the aftermath of betrayal either; don't let shame prevent that from happening! Ultimately it's okay if someone else knows that something hurtful happened between the two of you—they'll be there for support when needed most
This is also a good time to reach out to other people who've been through similar situations before and see how they handled things.
This is also a good time to reach out to other people who've been through similar situations before and see how they handled things. They can be a great resource for you as you begin to process what happened and how you want to move forward.
You can recover from difficult situations by working on yourself first, then looking at ways to interact with others again.
Recovering from betrayal is a process. It takes time, and it's not something that you can ignore or forget about until it goes away on its own. But if you know what to do, recovery can be much easier than you think.
First, you have to work on yourself first. Forgive yourself for being vulnerable in the first place and forgive yourself for letting the other person hurt you so badly. Understand that everyone makes mistakes and everyone has flaws—yours included—and then try not to make the same mistake again by treating others with respect in order not to get hurt again as well as setting boundaries around your personal space so no one tries anything funny with your heart again!
Conclusion
It's important to remember that betrayal is a personal thing and can be felt in different ways by different people. The best way to handle the situation is by taking care of yourself, letting go of the past, and focusing on moving forward with life. You deserve happiness and will find it when you find yourself again.
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